Emmy Li ‘25

The following post was adapted from a conversation between Emmy Li ‘25 and Noa Murray ‘26, an intern with the Global Engagement Office (GEO).¹

Emmy is a major in Economics and Environmental Studies. In Spring 2024, she studied abroad in South Africa through the Cape Town Consortium program on Globalization, Environment and Society.

How do you define race and ethnicity and what does it mean to you?

I define race and ethnicity based on self-identification. I don’t think anyone should tell you what race or ethnicity you are. For me, race is how I identify personally, and I identify as Asian. Ethnicity, on the other hand, is tied to your family’s background—where they come from, what their roots are. I identify as Chinese American. I was born in the U.S., but my parents are Chinese immigrants.

To me, race and ethnicity are ways to express who I am. I think they create complex dynamics, especially in the U.S. One thing I’ve learned is that these identifiers can mean different things depending on the country you’re in. Racism, too, can take on different forms and look very different from one place to another.

Why does identity matter for students studying abroad?

I think it’s important because when you’re traveling to a new place, feeling comfortable in your environment is key. Unfortunately, how you look isn’t always universally accepted, and people often make unsolicited comments about your appearance.

In South Africa, the legacy of apartheid has made race a deeply ingrained part of society and the economic system, which complicates things further. For me, studying abroad in Cape Town was a reality check. There aren’t many East Asians there, and the population is largely divided between white South Africans—who tend to be wealthier—and Black South Africans. The term “colored” is commonly used for those in the middle, but that’s not something you hear in the U.S.

In Cape Town, it took me three weeks to find someone who looked like me outside of my program cohort, and when I did, it was in one of the wealthier, touristy areas. South Africa has its own unique racial dynamics, and as an Asian woman, I felt out of place. Walking around, especially by myself, wasn’t always safe—there were instances of catcalling, and I always had to be extra cautious. My appearance made me stand out, which was challenging, but it was something I had to navigate during my time there.

In Durban, which is another major city, and also in Johannesburg (Joburg), there is a significant Indian population. However, in Cape Town, the population is primarily made up of Black, White, and “colored” people.

I never really understood where I fit within South Africa’s racial categories.  For example, I had to fill out forms multiple times where I had to check a race box. One form had separate categories for Black, Colored, White, and Indian. But I had no idea where to place myself as a Chinese person. In another form, “Chinese” was its own category, but so was “Asian.” It was confusing because the racial designations felt very much tied to South Africa’s specific social constructs, which didn’t always make sense for me.

Did you encounter challenges?

Yes, I definitely experienced microaggressions. On the street, I often heard people calling out “ni hao,” and when I was doing field research in an informal settlement, I faced similar comments.

One particular experience stands out. I was working with an NGO alongside my advisor from the University of Cape Town. During a focus group discussion, there was a break, and one of the participants from the settlement made a mocking “ni hao” at me. I just ignored it and walked away, because that’s how I would typically react to something like that in the U.S. However, when I told one of my NGO colleagues, who was Black South African, about the incident, her immediate response was, “Why didn’t you say hi back? That’s so rude.” I was taken aback because I hadn’t seen it that way.

I realized that the way we define race and ethnicity in the U.S., and how we recognize microaggressions, is very different from what people experience in Cape Town. Often, what we interpret as harmful or racist may stem more from obliviousness or ignorance than malice. I don’t think the person meant to be racist.

On the flip side, I had a much more directly racist experience when I ended up in the ER with food poisoning. I tried to warn the nurse that getting an IV into my veins would be difficult because I was dehydrated, and she responded by saying, “Let’s pray together.” The situation got worse when she asked if the person I was with was Japanese. I said, “No, I’m Chinese,” and then she started making “ching chong” jokes. I was already feeling terrible from dehydration, and this interaction just broke me down. I started crying.

What was also surprising was that a lot of the racism I encountered came from Black South Africans, which I wasn’t expecting.

There were also moments when some professors reflected the “model minority” myth. For example, one professor assumed that because I’m Asian, academic success should come easily to me. It was a subtle stereotype, but harmful nonetheless. Once, when I had asked them for examples of past successful projects to help guide my own, the professor’s response was, “Did you have a tiger mom growing up?” I was taken aback and asked, “How is that relevant?”  I really liked this professor and had a good relationship with them, but that comment was something I couldn’t overlook. Sometimes, when people know you well, they forget to filter themselves, and it was clear this was one of those moments.

I never explicitly raised this with the program at the time, but after returning, I mentioned it in an email and it eventually led to a discussion about race, where I suggested that faculty could be more mindful and perhaps undergo training to be more aware of these issues.

Looking back at some of these experiences, now that you’re back–is there anything you would have done differently?

Looking back, I think I would’ve been more open-minded and just said “hi” back instead of being closed off. I was trying to impose my thoughts on race and ethnicity from a U.S. perspective onto the South African environment. However, I don’t want to dismiss my own experiences—I think they were valid.

How did social dynamics play into your experience?

There were about 14 of us on the program, including the 2 South African students. My program had a few other Asian students, including a Korean student, an Indian student, and a biracial Asian student, so there was some diversity within our cohort. 

A lot of the group—particularly the partygoers—would frequent places where mostly white South Africans hung out, like clubs and bars. So when someone would ask, “Why don’t I see more diversity in these places?” I felt like, well, you’re kind of choosing to go to spaces where diversity isn’t as present.

One of the other Asian students was part of this crowd; I can’t say for sure what her experience was like. But I’m pretty sure she got some cat-calling, which was common for a lot of people in the program.

Even at a large campus like UCT, there wasn’t a real gathering space for Asians. I had a very strange experience during the event to sign up for student clubs.  When I approached the Asian Student Society booth, the person there told me that the space was for “non-Asians to learn about Asian culture.” It was basically a space for non-Asians to learn about things like anime. I didn’t join that club because it wasn’t the environment I was looking for.

Do you have any ideas for how diverse students could be better supported?

I do believe the program staff genuinely meant well.  But more could be done to prepare students, especially those of Asian descent, for what they might face in Cape Town. Sometimes, I think people view Asian students as more “inherently white” because of certain assumptions. The program doesn’t always account for how Asian students might experience race in South Africa differently than other racial groups.

The program’s Director is a white South African, but the Assistant Director is Indian. As a faculty member, she never really spoke in personal terms about her race or how it shaped her perspective.  It is important to discuss race and ethnicity in a broader context—not just focusing on Black and White dynamics, but also considering Asian students, and what it might mean to be a person of color in Cape Town. There weren’t any Latino students in our group, but if there were, that’s another conversation that needs to be addressed. Especially because, in Cape Town, East Asians aren’t a large part of the population, so it’s a different racial experience altogether.  It is important for the staff to be having these conversations.

Looking back, do you have any thoughts or advice you have for the Swat community? Any other thoughts on what you are bringing back?

My advice for students going abroad is definitely to talk to people who have gone before you. I’m always happy to be a resource for Swarthmore students, whether I’m still here or after I’ve graduated. I’d also suggest talking to other students in the program who might have different experiences—like the one Black American student from Pomona College. I think hearing her perspective would provide a different and valuable insight into the experience.

This experience was a big reality check for me, especially in terms of privilege. Even though I come from a low-income background, being abroad made me realize how much privilege I have, just by being able to study abroad in the first place.

I want to emphasize that my time in Cape Town was probably one of the best six months of my life. It really helped me gain a better sense of self and clarity in terms of my personal identity. 

1. The views and/or opinions represented in the GEO blog belong solely to the student(s) and do not represent Swarthmore College; students are not liable for any errors or omissions in the personal experiences they share. ↩︎